Vacation Gone Wrong - A Cautionary Tale.

[Hunter VanDyke]

2 hours ago, lintlizard said:

I think it was the whiny dog that derailed the date.....

🤣🤣🤣

[Hunter VanDyke]

9 hours ago, 2Big said:

 The guy fucked up at the most important part of his elaborate "trip planning": is there going to be sex? 

I'm not Normally a "why" person, but this one I really don't understand at all.  Why wouldn't a guy ask about this basic obvious question?  It's not like its a taboo topic with a SW, especially an ATF.  If he's already shelling out dough for a fun trip, and he knows he's going to want playtime with his ATF, why wouldn't he ask and get it all worked out?

 

 

[lustybustygina]

On 7/16/2021 at 0:36 PM, Vassago said:

I don’t understand how people can underestimate the power of positive thinking so much.

Next time, no talking, no second guessing just quietly roll over and slip your penis into her vagina.

It’s no different than finding out if your girlfriend is into anal sex the first time you try it.

 

Just make sure you have a plan B if things go horribly wrong. 
 

“I thought that was the pillow. My bad.” Is a good one to use.

Rape i'd say ..

[inkspot]

10 hours ago, frostyjack said:

Maybe. But a professional sex worker, who's career is to turn men on, jumps naked into bed with a regular client (who's relationship up until this point has centered around sex) with absolutely no intention of having sex with him, after spending the whole day with him, and she's surprised/shocked he wants to bang one out? I'm not buying it.

My thoughts exactly.  If this … story… is true, she knew exactly what she was doing jumping in the sack naked.  She is a pro. She was hoping for additional renumeration.

[Caressa Duval]

On 7/16/2021 at 6:00 PM, John F. said:

 

I guess I will chime in to answer your question of why no review.

First,. you're right.  She is a respectable provider, does have a lot of a class, and has a stellar reputation.   Second, there was nothing to review, since there was no session.  Third, I am not going to disclose her identity via a review or otherwise.  

It's just a story that might be helpful to others. It was  helpful to me write the story and to hear others' thoughts.

I hope that helps clarify things.  I am going to try to refrain from posting further on this subject. I hope folks understand.

It was a good discussion to post. It definitely brought out the true colors, in some of the men that replied!

Edited July 18, 2021 by Caressa Duval
comma

[Vassago]

On 7/16/2021 at 5:38 PM, Hunter VanDyke said:

This is a hobby for consenting adults. No consent is rape.  You aren't seriously advocating this are you? Is this how you function with women in your private life too? This is disgusting. 

Nobody mentioned rape except you. Infer what you wish.

 

The OP is completely ridiculous.

 

Anyone with any common sense would not expect sex from a sex worker without paying for it.

 

As such his post could have been truncated to a simple, “I was the dude who thought he’d get a freebie but went home sad.” 

 

It would have saved a lot of time.

 

 

[average1]

21 hours ago, Hunter VanDyke said:

I'm not Normally a "why" person, but this one I really don't understand at all.  Why wouldn't a guy ask about this basic obvious question?  It's not like its a taboo topic with a SW, especially an ATF.  If he's already shelling out dough for a fun trip, and he knows he's going to want playtime with his ATF, why wouldn't he ask and get it all worked out?

 

 

I'm with you on this one.  Reminds me of an old movie line from Cool Hand Luke..."What we have here is a failure to communicate."    And in this situation, there was definitely a failure to communicate.

[pfunk]

5 hours ago, average1 said:

I'm with you on this one.  Reminds me of an old movie line from Cool Hand Luke..."What we have here is a failure to communicate."    And in this situation, there was definitely a failure to communicate.

I agree 100%. I'm stunned that someone would plan a trip, with an escort, without discussing intimacy, ahead of time. 

 

[stevie-2249]

She should of never got in the same bed naked with him, I think most men would expect something is gonna happen. I’m sure they were having a good time until then.

[John F.]

On 7/17/2021 at 9:13 AM, lintlizard said:

I think it was the whiny dog that derailed the date.....

Your statement may not be far from the truth, though we will never know for sure.  I know I said that I would try to refrain from continuing to  post,  but maybe a couple of added details will add some comic relief to this sad story.

So just before things went South, she is letting me give her massage while she is naked on the bed.  Not more than five minutes into the massage,  I hear one of the dogs making a noise in the other room.   So I stop the massage and get up to see what's going on.

You see the dogs already had me on edge earlier because the non-whiney dog  vomited in the room a few hours before.  The dogs are used to homemade dog food and I brought some dehydrated store bought dog food (supposedly human grade) with me to make things a little easier. Now I am not a total idiot, though many of you will disagree. I did test the store bought dog food on the dogs for at least four days before the trip without issue. Also, I divided the two daily trip  meals into one typical meal and one store bought meal.

When I get back from checking on the dogs,  who were doing just fine,  a metaphorical  switch in her was flipped.  She was cocooned under the covers  and was unwilling to engage in any physical touch from that point onwards.  She suggested turning on the TV and was interested in watching a True Crime show.  I obviously wanted to do other things.   (I actually like the Dateline type shows under different circumstances.)

So maybe the unruly dogs played  a very small part in the downward spiral of this trip, but I love them all the same.  In truth, I don't think the dogs contributed to  the derailing of the "date."   However,  I thought these added details  might at least add some entertainment value to this thread.

 

[Hunter VanDyke]

3 hours ago, stevie-2249 said:

She should of never got in the same bed naked with him, I think most men would expect something is gonna happen. I’m sure they were having a good time until then.

This guy expected something to happen the second she said she'd go with him. She didn't have to do ANYTHING to entice him/turn him on. Shes his ATF! Hello!!!  Yall are making an issue with her getting naked in the bed with him....she could have been decked out in flannels, gloves, socks, a beanie and he still would have expected to fuck. Yall are crazy! It has nothing to do with what she wore or didnt wear. Lmao. 

She is a Sex Worker people. Wake up. Of course she was trying to please an ATF buy getting naked in bed. Thats what an ATF does! She probably didn't think he was going to put up a stink by paying her. Because that's what a providers ATF does! I can't. I just can't. 😂😂😂😂

[Hunter VanDyke]

40 minutes ago, John F. said:

Your statement may not be far from the truth, though we will never know for sure.  I know I said that I would try to refrain from continuing to  post,  but maybe a couple of added details will add some comic relief to this sad story.

So just before things went South, she is letting me give her massage while she is naked on the bed.  Not more than five minutes into the massage,  I hear one of the dogs making a noise in the other room.   So I stop the massage and get up to see what's going on.

You see the dogs already had me on edge earlier because the non-whiney dog  vomited in the room a few hours before.  The dogs are used to homemade dog food and I brought some dehydrated store bought dog food (supposedly human grade) with me to make things a little easier. Now I am not a total idiot, though many of you will disagree. I did test the store bought dog food on the dogs for at least four days before the trip without issue. Also, I divided the two daily trip  meals into one typical meal and one store bought meal.

When I get back from checking on the dogs,  who were doing just fine,  a metaphorical  switch in her was flipped.  She was cocooned under the covers  and was unwilling to engage in any physical touch from that point onwards.  She suggested turning on the TV and was interested in watching a True Crime show.  I obviously wanted to do other things.   (I actually like the Dateline type shows under different circumstances.)

So maybe the unruly dogs played  a very small part in the downward spiral of this trip, but I love them all the same.  In truth, I don't think the dogs contributed to  the derailing of the "date."   However,  I thought these added details  might at least add some entertainment value to this thread.

 

I certainly appreciate your post and the funny details. This is real life and all the craziness that entails. I have made a ton of mistakes in the 4yrs I've been back, but thats how we learn. Its sucks sometimes but we can look back and laugh. I'm glad you and your ATF discussed things and came to an understanding. Ultimately thats ALL that matters. Some people get weird about this stuff and hold grudges and the client/provider relationship is ruined. I for one am happy its all alright. ❤

[John F.]

22 hours ago, Hunter VanDyke said:

This guy expected something to happen the second she said she'd go with him. She didn't have to do ANYTHING to entice him/turn him on. Shes his ATF! Hello!!!  Yall are making an issue with her getting naked in the bed with him....

You are 100% correct

22 hours ago, Hunter VanDyke said:

I'm glad you and your ATF discussed things and came to an understanding. Ultimately thats ALL that matters. Some people get weird about this stuff and hold grudges and the client/provider relationship is ruined. I for one am happy its all alright. ❤

I think the understanding is that she will never see me again.   Maybe someday that will change, maybe not.  In any event, it was a lesson learned on  my part.

[Todoesprivado]

The only thing clear to me is that you made a mistake by posting this on an open forum, specially if you had any hopes she will give you another chance after that experience.

Another case of guys expecting sex workers to give them sex for free because they were led to think they are special. That will never happen. 

[pfunk]

1 hour ago, Todoesprivado said:

Another case of guys expecting sex workers to give them sex for free because they were led to think they are special. That will never happen. 

[Phil-anderer]

Oof... dude.  So she's asking you to massage her naked, and don't think about any ante for the pot?  

This trip coulda been awesome.  

[John F.]

13 hours ago, Todoesprivado said:

 

Another case of guys expecting sex workers to give them sex for free because they were led to think they are special. That will never happen. 

I added bolding  and underling to your statement for emphasis.  I was hesitant to address this,  but people keep making this point  Let me tell you why I think think you're wrong with when you use the word "never."

 

A former ATF (retired since 2017) offered me gratis sessions on two occasions. During her last two trips to Denver, an offer was made during  our initial session to come back for a second session during the current trip without charge.  These are the only instances this happened to me so I get it that this is not an everyday occurrence. I also get that this may not be an apples to oranges comparison to the present situation.

 

The most probable  reason I had  for high hopes on my recent trip is not based upon past experience though. It was based upon me reading things wrong. No escort previously suggested to me that we do an activity outside of the hobby. In this case, my ATF indicated a willingness to go on an overnight without me even first asking her to go on a trip.  My brain misconstrued things and led me down the wrong path.   Lesson learned on my part.

 

12 hours ago, Phil-anderer said:

Oof... dude.  So she's asking you to massage her naked, and don't think about any ante for the pot?  

This trip coulda been awesome.  

To be clear, she did not ask for the  massage.  I offered and she accepted. I don't know if that makes any difference, but I try to be accurate.  

Yes,  I messed up in several ways.

[Caressa Duval]

On 7/16/2021 at 6:00 PM, John F. said:

 

I am going to try to refrain from posting further on this subject. I hope folks understand.

I guess "try" is the key word here. This is still a one sided story, without her side it loses validity. No matter how many times you add more details about this. There a couple of key players on the board, that I am surprised have not commented on this thread.  One in particular pops to mind, he normally would pounce on a thread like this! You also write just like him, and he also likes to barter free time.  I could be wrong...or not.

[Prayforrain]

This is such bullsh*t. It’s not 100% on either party. The man is owning his part, and seeking solace on the board. The lady probably is also owning her part but doesn’t need to discuss it and that’s her choice. ‘Nuf said! 

For those pro ballers out there, gotta figure you’ve made some kind of mistake - thinking you’re “the one”, thinking “I can trust this lady to give her a deposit”, or “sure do an out all to my place”.  So many situations that have gotten f’ed up, we could publish a Worst Case Scenario book just on the hobby! But no need to come at him with this one-sided “man, you messed up” BS. He knows that. But don’t be some pussy whose afraid to call a lady out on her bullshit, too.

 

[pfunk]

2 hours ago, Prayforrain said:

But no need to come at him with this one-sided “man, you messed up” BS. He knows that. But don’t be some pussy whose afraid to call a lady out on her bullshit, too.

The only info we have (and it could be a complete fabrication) is his story.

I can't really call anyone out but him.

[Prayforrain]

Why call anyone out? The guy already sounded repentant. No need to jump anyone’s case.

[Savoir Faire]

On 7/17/2021 at 11:55 AM, Hunter VanDyke said:

I'm not Normally a "why" person, but this one I really don't understand at all.  Why wouldn't a guy ask about this basic obvious question?  It's not like its a taboo topic with a SW, especially an ATF.  If he's already shelling out dough for a fun trip, and he knows he's going to want playtime with his ATF, why wouldn't he ask and get it all worked out?

 

 

Ms VanDyke he didn't ask because he for some reason thought she was going to be his GFE for free that day. I mean she did mention she would go with him for free LOL but not as his GFE.What I would have did differently than him is I would have enjoyed our time at that beautiful location and before returning back, I would have placed my envelope in view and let her do the planning from there..........................Trust me, she would still be his ATF if he had placed what he spent planning in that envelope.

 

[John F.]

11 hours ago, Caressa Duval said:

I guess "try" is the key word here. 

11 hours ago, Caressa Duval said:

I guess "try" is the key word here. 

 Your point is well taken.  I don't seem to be trying very hard. When I saw Forest Gump applauding about a premise I know to be false as stated, I did feel compelled to respond.  It also turns out that I enjoy writing.  I don't write very much outside of work.

 

 

11 hours ago, Caressa Duval said:

  One in particular pops to mind, he normally would pounce on a thread like this! You also write just like him, and he also likes to barter free time.  I could be wrong...or not.

 

You are wrong. Maybe you're thinking about some other person that also has a whiny dog. In any event, I have never written or contributed to a thread about bartering or negotiating. 

We apparently have different definitions of bartering. I  have never offered to provide some non-monetary good or service in exchange for a service from an escort. Yes, we already established that I wrongly had an expectation of intimacy, but that's not bartering in my mind.  My expectation was based upon my limited past experience with overnights at hotels with GFs and S0s  and the fact that the initial suggestion of a trip together did not originate with me. I already acknowledged I was wrong for having this expectation numerous times.

Furthermore, though it's not a topic you brought up, I will add that I have never asked for an escort for a rate discount or countered an escort with a lower rate. 

 

[Savoir Faire]

On 7/19/2021 at 5:16 PM, John F. said:

You are 100% correct

I think the understanding is that she will never see me again.   Maybe someday that will change, maybe not.  In any event, it was a lesson learned on  my part.

Mr Kennedy some of us are pulling for you and hoping you get to see her again. Just ease up on posting about the story, let it die and find you a new ATF to take your mind off of her. To me you have owned your mistakes and I must admit, you look a heck of a lot better now than you did when you first posted this story.

 

[2Big]

On 19.7.2021 at 3:41 AM, John F. said:

So maybe the unruly dogs played  a very small part in the downward spiral of this trip,

I think you are underestimating the role your smelly, unruly, vomiting dog - a dog who apparently requires a three star michelin meal to be satisfied - played in this date going tits up ( so to speak). You should have brought him to a kennel for the weekend to eliminate an added source of distraction. 

On 19.7.2021 at 4:19 AM, Hunter VanDyke said:

She is a Sex Worker people. Wake up. Of course she was trying to please an ATF buy getting naked in bed. Thats what an ATF does! She probably didn't think he was going to put up a stink by paying her. Because that's what a providers ATF does! I can't. I just can't. 😂😂😂😂

Again, I agree 100%. 

The guy should have negotiated the sex part separately from all the other stuff. Unfortunately, a hooker can't pay her bills with a romantic getaway to the mountains. She needs cold hard cash. 

For me, if I want to fuck a hooker, I fuck a hooker. If I want to go on a "vacay", I do just that. Mixing the two usually ends in a clusterfuck. 

Let's just hope the OP learned the lesson. 

Edited July 24, 2021 by 2Big

[Caressa Duval]

9 hours ago, 2Big said:

 You should have brought him to a kennel for the weekend to eliminate an added source of distraction. 

Again, I agree 100%. 

The guy should have negotiated the sex part separately from all the other stuff. Unfortunately, a provider can't pay her bills with a romantic getaway to the mountains. She needs cold hard cash.

Let's just hope the OP learned the lesson. 

$800 room rate, absolutely could have put the dogs in a dog kennel, or hired a pet sitter. When 2Big becomes the "voice of reason",  time to let the thread die!

[Todoesprivado]

10 hours ago, 2Big said:

For me, if I want to fuck a hooker, I fuck a hooker. If I want to go on a "vacay", I do just that. Mixing the two usually ends in a clusterfuck. 

Let's just hope the OP learned the lesson. 

Glad to see the old 2Big back.   for a second there I thought the pandemic has gotten you soft

[Bravo1]

On 7/14/2021 at 10:10 PM, John F. said:

 

This is a long read, so if you do not have a lot of time on your hands, you will probably want to skip to the next thread.

 

Here is a story of how I messed up. I can't be the first person this has happened to and I know I will not be the last.  It may be the end of my hobbying activities.

 

It all started one afternoon with me showing my ATF pictures of a mountain range.  My ATF asked me when was the last time I was there.  "Well, not since 2017, since I have no one to travel with," I replied.

 

My ATF promptly responded , "I'll go with you."  

 

Me: "Well, your daily rate is  a little bit too decadent for my taste."  

 

My ATF:  "I won't charge you.  You just have to feed me."

 

Not really believing her that she was serious,  I told her to shoot me a text if she truly had interest in going.  So  about thirty minutes later, I am driving home, and I receive a text from her indicating that we should make plans to go on the trip soon.  All is sounding good . . . right?  Keep reading.  Things start falling off the wheels relatively quickly

 

So I start planning, and book an eight hundred dollar a night hotel.  I spend hours researching activities for us to do and restaurants that would best suit our dietary needs.   I start preparing and making a bunch of food to take a long way,  make reservations for activities,  make a bunch of calls to obtain  a dogsitter to watch my dogs  (they came along) for when we are out doing  scheduled activities.  I send all this info to my ATF to make sure she is on board with everything.

 

So the first day of the trip I drive an hour to Denver to pick her up.   The drive to the mountains is beautiful (except for one of my dogs whining incessantly in the car),  No traffic.  Everything is working smoothly!

 

After a beautiful drive, we spend an hour in the hot tub at the hotel, then we go to my favorite mountain range,  which is stunning. We then get take out, which was also amazingly good.  Again, all is going well.   

 

Now by nature, I am a planner.  I generally plan for all sorts of contigencies and what to do if things go wrong.  It's part of my job to think like that.  However in this case I did not have the foresight to think about what might go wrong between my ATF and me. 

 

It's time to go to bed and my ATF is laying naked next to me. (What more can anyone ask for?)  Well, that's when I learn from her that there will be no affection or physical intimacy on this trip.  (Queue in the "price is right" loser horn sound.)

 

Now I know I should have had the foresight to envision this as a  possibility, but I did not. The only times I have been around her in the past have been nothing but physical intimacy.  My brain did not register this as a probable outcome given how real she makes things feel during a session.  I also tend to get a little giddy when thinking about her and was just not thinking rationally.  ( Now some of you are thinking that I should have been prepared for this possibility given this was a trip, not a session. I already acknowledged that I was not thinking rationally.)

 

Right or wrong, I felt rejected and felt like I was being used for a free trip. She felt like she was being used for her body.  We decide to leave the next morning, but I could not sleep the whole night.  My behavior was poor.    The  four hour ride home was miserable. (Somehow my dog's whining sounded much worse on the way back home.) We were both emanating not so good feelings for each other.  That's basically how it ended.  I should have handled things much better.

 

I wrongly blamed her thinking she was more worldly than me about traveling with companions.  I wrongly expected her to clue me in on some ground rules beforehand.

 

 I could look past the bad experience of the trip, but my ATF could not. She will no longer see me on a professional.basis    Being with her  was one of my favorite activities .but my behavior on the "dream vacation trip"  torpedoed that relationship going forward

 

If I could go back in time and do things differently, I would.

I admire your honesty with your post and tge only thing that immediately comes to mind is WHY the topic of intimacy never came up beforehand?  That's something I would have wanted to discuss prior, especially since you said it's only ever been a "professional relationship".  Gotta discuss those things BEFORE you let yourself start assuming.  Did you say or do things out of frustration that permanently damaged your connection with her?  No chance at reconciling with an incredibly genuine ass kissing apology?

[Bravo1]

On 7/16/2021 at 7:12 AM, ilovewomen said:

Yeah, I noticed that too.  Kinda makes you wonder why he felt the need to join and post his mis-adventure.

I'm thinking this is most likely a fakenaccount he's using to make his post.  Would be willing to bet he's got another account here with history and reviews

[ilovewomen]

7 hours ago, Bravo1 said:

I'm thinking this is most likely a fakenaccount he's using to make his post.  Would be willing to bet he's got another account here with history and reviews

I agree